Who are you?
I’m Kay Stephens, reformed corporate attorney turned full-time romance author. My first novel, The Porn Star’s Daughter, a new adult romance, will be released January 16, 2024.
I’m a Boston native who settled down in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Yes, I live in the epicenter of book-banning and, no, I won’t be surprised when my book about a porn star gets me on my state’s bad list!
What do you write?
My novels are centered around themes of self-acceptance and sexual empowerment, two topics that were critical to my well being when I started writing. At that point, I was dealing with sexual harassment that had crippled my legal career and writing went from a part-time hobby, to a form of therapy, to a platform where I could openly discuss women’s empowerment.
I love being an author because it gives me the freedom to talk about anything and everything that floats through my brain.
Where do you write?
I am an extreme extrovert and have a difficult time doing anything alone, even writing. So rather than a closed-door office, I tend to work from the living room couch with my computer on my lap, my kids screaming in the background, and my Bose headphones set to level-10 noise cancelation.
I’ve had so many aspiring authors ask me what kind of software they need to start their careers! But I only use simple software—Microsoft Word to outline and draft, Excel to track my progress against my deadlines, and Thesaurus.com every time I can’t find my words (so about every 30 seconds).
Everything flips for me when I travel, though, because writing on a laptop when I’m on a plane makes me feel like everyone is reading over my shoulder! So instead of a laptop, I usually opt for a Five-Star notebook and a Uni-ball Vision pen.
When do you write?
I created a spreadsheet that tracks my daily word-count goal based on: (1) my starting date, (2) my self-imposed deadline, and (3) my progress to date. So, for example, if I have 30,000 words to write in a 30-day month, my daily word goal will default to 1,000 per day. If I procrastinate and miss my goal, my following days’ word goals will automatically increase to accommodate that procrastination, which incentivizes me to stay on track.
This might be a good time for me to reluctantly disclose I wasn’t just a corporate attorney, I was a corporate tax attorney, which makes me a massive Excel nerd by default. If you’re one of the rare creative types that didn’t start off in the fascinating world of tax, feel free to reach out for a copy of my spreadsheet. It really does keep you motivated and I’m more than happy to share.
Because I’m so hesitant to anger the Excel gods, I typically do at least some writing every day of the week—sometimes only for two or three hours, sometimes up to 16 hours in a day. It’s mayhem but tailoring your schedule around your personal schedule is one of the many great things about being an author.
Why do you write?
I’m motivated by the many young people in my life who are already being impacted by sexual harassment and think about their horrific stories every day before I start writing.
I, of course, already knew sexual harassment was pervasive in our society before it crept into my experience. But when I started sharing my story with the public, I discovered this issue is not only underreported, it can be entirely destructive to the lives of those affected. I’ve spoken to people who have suffered from depression, crippling self-doubt, and loss of career because they weren’t able to speak up after suffering harassment.
Through writing about self-acceptance and sexual empowerment, I’ve been able to build platform to discuss harassment—both how to address it and how to support people that have lived through it. It is patently terrifying to put my story out into the world but it seems to give others permission to share their stories. And that is well worth the resulting anxiety and 16-hour workdays.
How do you overcome writer's block?
When I dig deep into why I’m experiencing writer’s block, I always decide it’s just a manifestation of fear—fear that whatever I write will be ridiculed or rejected or that maybe the words will just stop flowing today.
Listening to a quick guided meditation is the only way for me to move me past that fear. There are millions of free meditations online and you can find some that only take a few minutes to get through, so I highly recommend giving it a try.
Bonus: What do you enjoy doing when not writing?
I spend an uncomfortable amount of time at the gym instead of sleeping since I, like many authors, am not able to turn off my brain at night.
During the summers, I also partake in the Oklahoma pool-party scene (because we’re so much more than just book bans!). If you have ever been to Vegas and thought “This is fun but it could use more cows,” it’s well worth checking out on your own.
My thanks to Kay Stephens for today's interview.